Never Say Divorce Memes

I see memes like this on Facebook all the time. Maybe I'm being over sensitive, but every time one of my friends posts one I want to throat punch them. (Or your know, unfriend them). 

I admit, before I was married, I felt this way too. I couldn't foresee a future where the man I decided to marry would do something so horrendous that I couldn't get past it. 

As it turns out I married a man who cheated. A lot. He was an habitual cheater. A serial adulterer. In fact I don't think the man was ever faithful, but I think he and I had different definitions of faithful. To me, you can be unfaithful and not be currently cheating. There's a big difference. Cheating is the actual physical act of adultry. Being unfaithful is everything else that goes along with it. So to me, my ex was maybe not always cheating but he was never faithful. At one point he had a girlfriend, was also sleeping with her sister AND was sleeping with prostitutes he found on Craigslist. As it turns out, the prostitute thing was something he did on a regular basis all along. 

I'm writing this all rather nonchalantly now, I've had plenty of time to process it. At the time that all of this came to light? I was horrified. We seperated for some time.... and then I took him back. Looking back it was attitudes like this meme that allowed me to think that staying in a bad marriage was a good idea. Now my ex wasn't just a cheater he was a rotten husband in other ways that I'm not quite ready to delve into here, so when things were bad they were REALLY bad. However on the flip side, when things were good, they seemed really good.

 I grew up with a single mother. I wanted my daughter to grow up with both of her parents. I assumed that as my husband aged, he would somehow grow out of the bad behavior and that eventually things would be fine. He swore up and down that he wasn't cheating anymore. He even had an app on his phone that allowed me to track him. Then I went on vacation with the kids and my family. My ex stayed behind. I spoke to him every evening that we were gone. As it turns out, he was sleeping with Craigslist hookers at 3 in the afternoon. When I returned home, I found a paper with the name of a cheap motel and room number written on it. That's when all his lies really started to unravel. I realized that he had never stopped cheating. He had just learned to hide it better. One way that he would get money for the prostitutes without me knowing was to prepay for gas. See he would take a $100 bill and walk into the gas station and use it to prepay for gas. The attendant would give him a receipt for the gas, showing that he had spent the $100. Then he was free to pump whatever amount he wanted and come back for his change. Now he has a receipt accounting for the money to show me and cash in his pocket to spend on girls. Pretty ingenious, right? 

It was finally to the point where I had to take a serious look at our situation. This is real life, not Pretty Woman. These aren't nice girls hooking their way through med school. These are likely drug users who were banging his money in their arm the minute he'd leave. His sex addiction was going to kill us both and he refused to get any help. Hell, maybe I'm wrong here and there was no sex addiction. Maybe he was just a horny douchbag. Either way? I couldn't remain married to him. 

So yeah, when I see my friends post memes like this, I take it personal. After everything, I still believe in love. I still believe in the institution of marriage. I don't know if either will come my way again, but I'm hopeful. I also know that not every marriage is fixable. Not every problem can be worked out. It takes two people to make a marriage but it only takes one to destroy it. My marriage was not something I could fix myself, no matter how hard I tried. 

I know that with him gone, my life is simpler. I'm happier. My kids are happier. I'm a better parent without all the stress brought on by being married to a cheating jerk. Now, if he would just pay a little child support....

Cargo Blush...looks can be deceiving

For quite some time now I've been wanting to try out Cargo's blush. It's regularly $26 for each metal tub so when Ulta had it on sale for $13 during their 21 Days of Beauty Sale I snapped up 2. (I probably would have bought another but they sold out of the other color I wanted to try very quickly)

The containers look pretty huge when compared to other similar products. I had read reviews stating there was a lot of product for the money. However when my 2 arrived one was detached from the packaging. Now it's not a big deal when it comes to using the blush. The blush itself wasn't broken but as you can see from the picture there is a plastic spacer that takes up over half of the metal container. The actual amount of blush is very average. 

This isn't to say that I'm not pleased with the product. It turns out I really do like the blush. The water resistant Los Cabos (the orangey one) is actually very flattering. I've been mixing it with the regular powder blush in Catalina and I'm loving the color combo. I'm just surprised that a company that generally has minimalistic packaging is making their containers appear to contain more than they do. Yes, there is a weight clearly stamped on the back. I'm not saying they're committing fraud or anything that serious, but if I hadn't received the particular package that I did, I would have expected it to last much longer and probably been kind of annoyed when I realized it was almost empty less than half way to the bottom of the tub. 

First Coat....

Just finished the first coat of copper paint on the stove. And....it's a little scary. As of now it doesn't look very good. I'm still hopeful though. The first coat on the fridge looked pretty rough so I'm hoping that the stove will turn out well too. The metallic paint seems a bit more sheer so I think it may take some additional coats to cover. 

Stove Makeover: Step One

So since the fridge painting went so well I decided to start on the stove today. I bought some copper colored paint at the craft store the other day, it says it's good for metal and is safe for indoor and outdoor projects. I started today by sanding and priming the stove with the Glidden Gripper again. I taped off the stove top and door, though for whatever reason the Frog Tape that I love so much absolutely refused to stick to the glass. I used bleach cleaner and dried it completely but my favorite painter's tape wouldn't stick. I ended up using some orange Scotch tape I had bought on clearance for my daughter to craft with. 

Here's a pic of the first stage. Once the primer is dry I'll start in with the paint. Hopefully I'll have some nice pics to share of the finished project soon!

Save on Halloween at Target

Today only Target has a great deal on their Cartwheel app: 40% halloween costumes. They've got 40% off Hershey Candy Halloween assortment bags too, but the costume is the biggie I think. 

If you don't have the cartwheel app and you shop at Target, do yourself a favor and download it. 

Right now. 

Seriously, I'll wait. 

This app is fantastic. The more you save, the more spaces you unlock to be able to save even more. Since downloading this app I've saved over $500! I mean come on, that's huge. That's $500 that stayed in my pocket. The savings was on things I needed to buy anyway so it's even better. The app is free so there's nothing to lose. 

Man I love Target. 

Glitter Tile Wall

Another room on my small budget, DIY, home makeover list, is my bathroom. We only have the one, I'd seriously sell an organ for a second bath. Well maybe for a second bath and a basement. Organs seem pretty valuable....

But since that doesn't seem like a viable option, I'm stuck working with the one and only bathroom I have. The wall behind the toilet is white tile. Well, I'm not sure what the original color is, from what I saw behind the trim I think it's some sort of a burgundy / gray combo, but when I bought the house it had already been painted white. I've given it a couple more white coats in the last 10 years, the most recent being a couple weeks ago. I also pulled up the old, ugly linoleum and put down tile. Sticky tile, but still. It's a vast improvement and I did it all by myself. (Really REALLY proud of that one!)  I painted the walls a soft green, and replaced the shower curtain. I also used Mdoge Podge to attach some black and white damask paper to the plastic plates surrounding the light switch and electric plugs. It was a huge improvement all around but it needed something...more. 

And then it hit me. 

Glitter. 

The bathroom needed glitter. I decided to add some sparkle to that tile wall behind the toilet. So I picked up some Modge Podge. I have a decent supply, but for this I wanted something extra strong. I bought the kind that says it's indoor/outdoor and dishwasher safe. I figure if it can go outside and go through the dishwasher, it should be good enough to hold up some glitter in my bathroom. I might not have worried as much in any other room (I use Modge Podge a LOT) but the ventilation in my tiny bathroom isn't great so I wanted to make sure the steam didn't ruin my work. 

I picked up some extra fine white glitter. It gave the wall I really pretty opalescent sparkle. I started by cleaning the tile with bleach just to make sure it was extra clean so everything would stick. I mixed some Midge Podge and glitter in a small bowl and started painting. Originally, I used a foam brush but it wasn't working as well as I thought it would so I ended up using a regular paint brush. It took several coats but it's come out exactly the way I had hoped. I love it! Now the only thing left to do is look around for the next thing in the house I can glitter....

Finished Fridge

So it took me a few extra days to completely finish he fridge, mostly because I was putting off the trip to the craft store. I love Michael's. I really do. However...every time I go in there for a few quick things I end up needing to refinance my house to foot the bill. No, no, I suppose it's not really quite that bad but I'm totally guilty of way too many impulse buys when I shop for craft supplies. 

This time I needed white ribbon to finish the board I made to cover the ice maker in the freezer door. I downloaded the Michael's app so I was able to get some coupons to help cover all the things I bought in addition to the ribbon. 

Anyways, I think it came out pretty well. I'm sorry, I didn't take any pictures of the process, though it was really pretty simple. I used a random piece of cardboard, (It was actually part of the box from the new toilet seat I installed in the bathroom.), a couple old tee shirts which I cut up and layered over the cardboard to add a little padding, and a piece of fabric I had laying around. The ribbon I had in my bow making supplies, but since I ran out half way through I had to make that aforementioned trip to the craft store for more. I actually attached everything with duct tape. The ribbon is just woven, over-under to keep it a little extra secure. Th fabric I chose has a grid pattern on it so it was easier to place each ribbon equidistant from the one before. 

Overall I'm pretty geeked about the total transformation. I picked up some bronze paint to do the stove (and maybe the microwave, depending on how well the stove looks) so hopefully the kitchen will start to take shape soon!